Thursday, October 4, 2018
Benny is an amazing man, I was privileged to have known him since I was born.
As a child visiting family in Saskatoon he would always make time to play with me, notoriously the board game ‘’Trouble” at my great-grandmother’s house (his grandmother), even letting me win sometimes! A bilingual speaker, Benny would patiently translate Ukrainian to English for me so I could understand my Baba and other older relatives, helping my child-self understand and follow the conversation and even trying to teach me some. He always made me feel included and a welcome member, not just a child in the way.
Growing up I came to appreciate Benny further, in my 20s and 30s visiting the family in Saskatoon I grew a newfound respect for Benny in his knowledge of the entire family tree. He knew names, spouses, where they were all from, where they got married, where their kids got married, where they were buried and all the glorious comedy and drama in between these life events. It was wonderful to access such a well of information about my own extended family – a gift Benny gave to many in the family and one I will always be grateful for.
Beyond family knowledge I would have to say that Benny is one of the smartest people I have ever met. His capacity to retain information, recite statistics and navigate history is remarkable. From trips to Bodnar’s old church and cemetery, where he knew where everyone was laid to rest, to citing historic and modern sports records – Benny knew it all.
My most recent memories of Benny are of us arriving in Saskatoon. With our car rental in tow first stop was to ‘kidnap’ Benny so he could be our personal guide, escort and partner in crime as we joyrided from one family members house to the next, with stops for lunch at the Station and other hotspots and visits to Woodlawn cemetery. He was always a great sport, never asking why we didn’t call first or could he take a break from the whirlwind of us crazy Gilecki’s from Toronto. He always had high spirits and with his ‘whatever’ and ‘yeah, yeah, yeah’ attitude got in the car for whatever adventure laid ahead with us.
I am so grateful that I got to introduce my husband and daughter to Benny, they are lucky for having got to meet him. In 2015 when Kevin and I drove to Saskatoon, Kevin’s first time there, we were lucky enough to celebrate Benny’s 56th birthday with him. We suggested we go to a downtown pub so we could treat him to dinner. Not one for frequenting such establishments, Benny was up for it and we all had a wonderful evening. Benny even indulged in about a half pint of beer to celebrate the occasion, though I think he more enjoyed the cheesecake at the end!
Most recently we got to spend time with him last Thanksgiving, not even a year ago. Benny met our daughter Serenna then. When we arrived at his house, as we always did, I passed him our then 8-month old little wonder – he held her super tight, cuddling her close and showed her all of the rooms of his house, taking her on a full tour. Just like when I was little, he included her even though she was so young and little right from the moment we arrived.
As he toured the house he showed her a photo of me and my brother walking with him in a snowy, sun-filled Saskatoon landscape that is posted on his wall in the kitchen from decades before and a framed photo of my Papa and Grandma that is in his display case from even longer ago. He showed her the photo of my Uncle Jack, his dad, which we had gifted to him for his birthday the year before at the pub. It’s of Uncle Jack with his conductor’s hat on and smiling broadly – I know without doubt that Benny is reunited with his dad now and also Baba, and all of our family members that went before us. For me that brings some peace in the tremendous loss I feel to have lost this wonderful soul too early.
Trips to Saskatoon will never be the same, but Benny will live on in our memories and stories just as he made sure everyone else did too with his stories and memories in life. Miss you Benny. xo
